Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
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He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
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He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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