Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize