How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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