You just made me feel so damn special
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
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she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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