whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize