I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
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