i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
its not stalking. its research.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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