Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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