After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize