let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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