Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize