Texts From Last Night

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  (705): View more from Ontario

  Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence

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  (705): Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence http://tfl.nu/779y
  Replies (66) Good night (20078) Bad night (1021) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head

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  (630): Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head http://tfl.nu/4494
  Replies (45) Good night (5682) Bad night (754) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment

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  (916): It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment http://tfl.nu/y1ii
  Replies (15) Good night (923) Bad night (3317) Order T-Shirt
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.

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  (229): Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night. http://tfl.nu/4bxb
  Replies (10) Good night (4698) Bad night (1504) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."

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  (678): Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages." http://tfl.nu/1o45
  Replies (24) Good night (1560) Bad night (14224) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses

  (1-316): View more from Kansas

  That sounds dangerous

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.

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  (316): So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses (1-316): That sounds dangerous (316): Don't worry......were wearing oven mits. http://tfl.nu/woxn
  Replies (9) Good night (4380) Bad night (787)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine

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  (214): I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine http://tfl.nu/t8mm
  Replies (21) Good night (3425) Bad night (1661) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.

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  (720): It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer. http://tfl.nu/gu1j
  Replies (8) Good night (1006) Bad night (1735) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system

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  (484): she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system http://tfl.nu/uwvr
  Replies (12) Good night (2624) Bad night (1094) Order T-Shirt
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.

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  (709): I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking. http://tfl.nu/va6a
  Replies (2) Good night (1690) Bad night (667) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him

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  (519): he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him http://tfl.nu/dkoo
  Replies (3) Good night (1126) Bad night (539) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.

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  (814): She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow. http://tfl.nu/dddh
  Replies (3) Good night (332) Bad night (1144) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.

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  (215): There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her. http://tfl.nu/lhzd
  Replies (11) Good night (1164) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.

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  (865): My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together. http://tfl.nu/dn4t
  Replies (2) Good night (554) Bad night (138) Order T-Shirt
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  (661): View more from California

  Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.

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  (661): Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre. http://tfl.nu/eizk
  Replies (4) Good night (580) Bad night (383) Order T-Shirt

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