She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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