Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
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I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
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I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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