My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize