I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Boobs speak an international language.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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