would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
4 words: hood of his car
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize