bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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