Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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