A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize