Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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