God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Duck Duck Cougar?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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