He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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