You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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