Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize