Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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