Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I could make wine with my vomit
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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