So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize