Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
how drunk are you?
Several
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize