I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize