i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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