You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize