I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize