god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
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Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
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On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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