Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize