I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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