Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize