Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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