Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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