There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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