We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I made him laugh his dick is mine
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