So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize