how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
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I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
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I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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