Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
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You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
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Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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