Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize