Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize