Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize