Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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