I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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