I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize